Sunday, June 7, 2009

How do you NOT know you have to go?

As I was sitting on the throne one morning trying to get some inspiration for a blog, I remember something that happened to me at work.

I had just come back from a Mexican restaurant where I had lunch.

I go to the restroom because I had to pee (or so I thought) so I go in the first stall.

I assume the position, (ladies, you know the one) then out of nowhere... you guessed it. BAM! Now.... if I HAD known I had to do THAT (again, how can you not know?) .. This is how i would have handled it:

I would go to the very last (poopie) stall as I call it. If there is lysol (or other spray) available I will spray the hell out of the area before I clear the log jam. Then I let it rip. During, I will give a courtesy flush, and another spray. After, I will spray again and flush however many times is necessary to remove all lingering evidence not flushed down the 1st 4 times. But if it looked anything like Mental Poo's I would have ran out screaming.

Then, I wash my hands and I make my escape. I open the door a crack, see if the coast is clear and run like hell. Watching my back to make sure no one saw me. Then I sneak out the back door, go around front and pretend like I went to get something out of my car.

But this time I didn't have any warning.. so I feel sorry for whomever walked in after me.

Afterwords, of course I had to find out if I was the only weird one that to have this happen. So I asked a friend (who went to lunch with me) if this has happened to her as well.. she told me, "yes, just yesterday" and she was here at work.

As luck would have it, as I was telling her how I would have gone to the "poopie stall", my boss walked up behind me just when I uttered those words. She turned around and went back into her office. I was so embarrassed, I said "Oh my God, I can't believe I said 'poopie stall' and my boss heard me."

You guessed it, the 2nd time I said it, she was behind me A-gain, this time she shook her head as she walked back to her office... I am just glad she knows my sense of humor.

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